1. This is honestly the first time I've grieved a death in my life. I'm 30. Quite a nice run if I say so myself.
2. People don't want to hear about your grief. They say they do. But, they don't. These posts about my sadness are barely getting any hits whereas my "big news" post got many more hits than my average. As a blogger quite enamored with the number trends of my blog posts, this fascinates me yet it's completely understandable. I don't want to hear about your bad news. I want to read your birth stories, read your healthy redo recipe of a chocolate cake, hell, I even want to see your new haircut. But, read about your sadness and your grief? No, thank you.
3. Too bad my life is full of sadness and grief right now.
4. I won't lie. I think I'm doing pretty good. Even with kids that won't stay healthy, we've been getting dressed and doing our normal things. Still many more cartoons that I'm comfortable with but I'm slowly easing out of the Netflix crutch. I'm finally doing the last month's worth of laundry that has piled up and proven my family has entirely too many clothes. I'm cooking real food for meals rather than just handing out apple slices and blueberries.
5. But, I'm sad and hollow on the inside. I can tell my hormones are still in flux. I still prefer to zone out during the day and find myself getting unreasonably frustrated with my children. I want to shut down but can't. I'm too needed.
6. My friend, Alisha, sent me this link to a site for bereaved parents. Yesterday I finally gathered the courage to visit the site. Their explanation of grief was a godsend. It made me feel normal. Cause, you know, this grieving business is new to me.
7. I'll go ahead and throw it out there that I haven' taken pictures of my kids in 2 months. Seems like that bit of news fits with this depressing theme.
8. My Jessica Seinfeld's 'Deceptively Delicious' avocado chocolate chip cupcakes were delicious. Avocado for the fat in lieu of oil. Brilliant.
9. #8 was my at my attempt at a normal blog post. Pitiful attempt, yes. Maybe next week will be my week to write about non-depressing things. Maybe not.
10. And, yes, this post's title was a total bait and switch. Forgive me. I'm a whore for blog hits and I'm curious to see how a cheerful title will affect the numbers.