Friday, July 22, 2011

blog block.

I'm in the midst of a mental blog block.  So, I decided to sit and type and see what happens.

Let's see.

I'm tired.  Not to complain.  But, I'm tired.  Sleep deprived tired.  And, tired of playing referee between my two children.  Even Liza is getting rough these days.  Yeah.  She likes her little purse and putting on her shoes but I'm pretty sure she isn't going to be a dainty little flower of a girl.  I met a woman the other day whose babies are 2 years apart just like mine but they are September and mine are August.  I asked if the big brother was rough with the little brother.  Never.  She said never.  Seriously.  She even said the older was "protective" of the little.    My heart broke a little bit at that. 

 Do I have a deviant almost-3-year-old or is your older flat out mean to your little? 
 If you have children that are always kind and sweet I don't want to hear about it. 

Is that bad?

I find myself jealous of Taylor when he mows the yard.  Yard work.  I don't like to sweat.  I don't like to get dirty.  I don't even know how to operate the mower.  Yet, I want to mow the yard.  I want 2 hours of time that nobody can bother me because of the noxious fumes and the roar of the mower.  

I also find myself jealous of his quiet showers every morning.  I don't want to go to work.  I just want the quiet shower.  

Is that bad?

I don't think it is.

Do you?

Every time I sit on the floor and Henry sits in my lap, Liza decides she needs to nurse.  She now paws at my shirt and pushes brother out of the way so she can get what she wants.  

Somebody needs to teach these children some manners.

There are lots of things I want to do.  Become a doula.  Become a childbirth educator.  Finally write that children's book that floats around in my head.  Clean out my closet and find out what's been hanging out in there since we moved in 5 years ago.  Um.  Plan my children's birthday party that takes place in 3 weeks.  Yet.  Nothing happens.  I feel successful when we eat supper and I manage to clean the kitchen every 2 days.  Seriously.

No joke when I say it's a messy life.

I actually took pictures of my children today.  And, I realized why I've been low on pictures. It's impossible to referee and snap pictures to be proud of at the same time.  

Turns out my blog block wasn't really a writing block.  A post just wasn't forming in my head nice and pretty like I like.  But, it's okay.  I'm pretty busy.  You know.  Keeping my children from killing each other.

9 comments:

Amanda @ Gratefully Growing in Grace said...

I JUST told my husband this morning that I never expected to be playing all-day referee between a 3 year old and a one year old. No dainty little girly flower here, either. I've realized that Big Brother is rarely to blame for the scuffles these days... Eeek!

Laura @ our messy messy life. said...

Ha! Big brother is usually to blame here but sissy is certainly not totally innocent :)

Jessica said...

ditto what you said. I made my husband "let" me mow the other week. Not that I enjoy it like he does, but I just want the peacefullness that he gets. Sucks that he drives 30 min to work everyday, but I'm totally jealous of that. Plus the bathroom breaks he gets, sans kiddos. The lunch with no one else eating it before you take a bite...and the list goes on.
I also get tired of playing ref to my almost 3 yr old and his big sis and little sis. He likes to tackle, pull, push, hug and shove, etc. And it makes me crazy. I can sympathize with you...
I did just order him a "punching bag" (I have to think of something else to call it though). I don't want to teach him hitting of course, but he has obvious energy that I would rather him exert on plastic rather than his little sister. We'll see how it works. Maybe I'll be using it in the end...

Anonymous said...

Gosh, two years apart and the older child is sweet, kind and abused by a younger sibling. Umm, sounds like my two children. But,
the little one turned out to be a most responsible adult and wonderful parent and as a child was full of personality and spunk.

That's why a part-time job with some one else taking care of the kids, even for a few hours a week, helped keep me sane. And "Barber"
loved you and you her.

Keep me sane? Hah! Antidepressants helped me the most.

Mama

BrownFamily said...

Are you talking about my kids? Seriously! My girls are 15 months apart and there is always some form of hitting, hair pulling, or toy stealing going on around here. My Mom always tells me "this too shall pass"...we'll see about that!

Portugirl said...

Gosh, I feel like I just read the story of my life! I feel the same way. I miss having quite Me time;) and time to do everything that in my head I already did! The kids are so demanding now is hard to get anything done! But hang in there sister! You are a great MOm!!!;)

Kristi said...

I asked Craig last week if I could mow the yard and he said there was no way since people in the neighborhood would "talk" if he allowed his pregnant wife to mow the grass in the summer!
I am also jealous of Craig being able to wake up in the morning and roll out of bed and take a shower first thing, somedays I let the kids go in with him to remind him he's never alone!
I just turned around and the boys were dumping a box of crayons all over the floor. great teamwork but there is always a fight or push.

Laura @ our messy messy life. said...

Jessica, love the inclusion of "hug" in the list of your son's activities. "Hugging" is big around here too. And, I am jealous for you of the 30 minute drive to work. Sounds nice, huh? What about "agression sack"?

Mama, thanks for the compliments!

Andrea, I'm not so sure it's gonna pass.....

Monica, they are demanding but oh so cute! We need to get together :)

Kristi, you must really be needing some time if you are wanting to mow too. And, I'm awful. We barge into the bathroom within moments of Taylor getting into the shower. Teamwork. I need to think of it as teamwork when they get into things together :)

Anonymous said...

I so identified with the whole blog. T is so sweet to do stuff for me but doesn't understand I would love some alone time to do laundry, yardwork, etc.
My two fight and are loving but lots of whining too.
So understand!!!
dd